…in silent reverie..

i ran as fast as i could after class
the wind blowing my hair into a mess
  i  could no longer be apart
feel him, hear him calling my heart:
  “come out and play
no work of any kind tonight..just come rest under my shade” 
           Ran So Fast
i could barely keep balance
    it had been a WHOLE day
and i could no longer be away…

my tree lives in
          my secret garden
   unnoticed by any who try
        to find..although it does not hide
it turned dark tonight…quicker than normal
a shade of rusty crescent moon and purple
filled the horizon
as i lay under my tree’s branches..this feels a little different -
maybe it’s the sky?
      did night
suddenly turn light???
         no! wait! my tree -
  - the leaves -
                             – They Are Fire

oh! wait…look again…
      just the leaves changing
         
                    flooding
   down 
               orange. 
 yellow.
                             red.
all  
         raining
  down
                     covering entirely
         get lost in leaves
now part of me

feeling overTake Me

 

i would be SO  great for Him!!!
i have so much Love to give.
only wish he would be open to Receiving it..

conversations come easy between the two of us
my eyes never wander
never will..my heart
will stay focused on him forever and Ever…swear!
there is no need to search for better
if he loves me back

no man exists in my world but my love
he is my center. he is here. There.
in all the spaces in between.
Devotion is my middle name
when he loves me back

he makes me smile and the only mission i have:
create an environment where he feels as happy as i am
when he is near…feel myself falling
but not as scary as first thought
because he might love me back

so i sit.
do not speak.
just wait.
in case he loves me back

it’s not what he can give
that i want but what i will give
            for him to Receive
     i want to be his shoulder to cry/lean
on.                my legs, a place for his head
    to rest
when he does not feel well
     that’s when i make a bath for him
           then bathe together in the warmth
                       our bodies
    fit like puzzle pieces
      when we fall asleep
    our breath,  once separate, now inhale as one
exhaling  together         feel the LOVE
the peace comes easy   -                 s  e    &     fa    
                                                    i                           l       
                              chests    R                                      l
     harmoniously    -      i want to do all
            this for him.   and him alone
no one else do i have this need to be there for in this way because -
how could he not love me back?

so here i wait for him (and him alone)
-  if he does not come
then i will just stay up for a little longer
     just in case he remembers 
                he loves me back <3

..meaning of..

Given to be Broken
Asking only to be received…

they break because we cannot see the Full potential in ourselves.
to be received is to be realized.  acknowledged. found out.

the meaning of the phrase
(to me)
is that hearts are destined to be broken
(by our own doing)
we search outside for Divinity. in others
while it has always lived within. like God
our hearts wait patiently for us to realize that
and  acknowledge how Special we are.
Hearts contain the universe. the Answers. Heaven. nirvana.
nothing. Everything.
whatever you want to define it as. we see glimpses
occassionally, but are unable to Fully grasp it
until we are no longer here – in this time. until
this existence ceases, we are incapable of seeing continuously
life is too busy and distracts so easily..but
our Hearts will continue to wait. until…then =)

hearts Break because they are disconnected
from the “physical” realm. from the perception
of reality we have created. and until United:
~ MindBodySoul ~
they call out to be heard. to be Received…
(the Loud life produces::makes their cries hard to hear::whispers)
and they will continue to Break until we become Aware <3

did that make sense?
or was i just rambling nonsense??

<3 listen to your heart <3

first quiet the world inside then out. the busy-ness
of life muffles Heaven within.
desires hide
the Truth that is there the whole time.

she whispers softly, so it is hard to hear
her if you do not quiet your emotions. life is so Simple. but We
are human and need
to complicate it.
Create
problems and questions from nothing.
clear. calm
quiet…now
L  i  s  t   e   n
can you hear her
speak? comes in faint. Time will cure that. Broken
because she cannot be Heard
Asking….
but as long as we do, we will be. Receive
this moment. in the nothingness lives Eternity
clear. calm
Now
receive it fully. see? not so Hard =)

she has been received and will
always as long as we do all
the Beauty in front of us that busy life
tries to blind
us from. now i am Aware. clear
my mind. Calm my Heart. now Receive
and be received <3

be the one i need…the one i trust most. don’t stop inspiring me…

makes sense…

through all the years taught:

two different worlds.
but there’s something there
raised differently. seeing things in a different light.
but there’s something undeniable
something.. a chemistry so tangible that the differences disappear.

the two are unalike, but there is a chance meeting
a window of opportunity.
and it doesn’t happen right away.
takes a little more time because the dissimilarity
is too strong
but they do not know how powerful the attraction is
the force cannot be stopped easily.
and it’s not.
eventually love
overcomes all
so it makes sense for me
to feel this
so undeniably
unignorable emotion. you give me butterflies
and peace and excitement
and calm and sadness from not being close
and a smile on my face from every memory or speaking your
name and pain for every second
i don’t let you in.

beautiful girls are invisible

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

feel the shivers
like a million whispers
continuous breath
lingering down your neck..tingles
like baby hairs tickling
when fingertips press light, moving up quick
then abruptly leave, leaving me wanting more

foreign right before it turns familiar
part of me
i am ecstasy!

a sort of double vision, but not as clear
auras jump out and i cannot see
anything BUT the energy
around each thing…so bright i get lost in the glare

i am high right now
on nothing specific…no drug, no drink, nothing
just consumed by this feeling
SO strong but indescribable
wish you could taste it’s sweetness

this man loves this woman
but she does not feel the same
she hurts him with another…
he blackmails her to go
- she has a way out -
but the other does not fulfill the deal
so she is forced to venture off with him

he is mean to her
alone – and bored…she wanders
she finds out about who he is for the first time
she falls in love with him
but he does not seem to care anymore
BUT
they finally begin to get each other

A F T E R    2    Y E A R S ! ! !

she loves him
he loves her
~ it is perfect ~

but then he is gone…
he took her to punish
but they both felt real love
for the first time. FULL…
her eyes shine from deep inside
he can see it. feel it. hear it. touch it. smell it. taste it.

he asks for forgiveness
but he does not need forgiveness
she says i’m sorry…

….and then it ends..

her heart broke
but better to have love and lost… as they say <3

to feel something SO real and tangible and alive!
even for a moment is worth any amount of pain
because the peak of pleasure is SO much higher
the low after might last longer in time…
but the memory of that happiness. love. peace. calm. perfection
can never leave your soul. in this world or all that follow after :)

it takes no time to fall in love…

you pull at my strings
do you realize?

when you are away
my heart breaks until i see your face
in real life. in sweet dreams. or just in my mind
any which way…my heart sings
and i am up in the clouds once again
light headed…i cannot think straight
just counting down the time until later
do you see?

when you are near
whether a tangible fantasy
or when the flesh is REAL
- you touch me
in the depths of my soul -
i become crazy out of control
…because…
you make my heart super happy
can you tell?

you are my inspiration
my current addiction
that i want to last forever.
i hear you calling my spirit out of this caged body
and she grows frustrated because she cannot leave
can you feel it?

while your presence is missing
this feeling
- E M P T I N E S S -
leaves me weak
my heart cries
my mind wanders
my soul screams out
do you get it yet?

i cannot think straight
i feel uncontrollably run by something other than…
i want want want want want
i need this high
because my memory is starting to fail me
not getting me to where i want to be
where i know i can be…but somehow cannot achieve currently…

how about now…
you make my heart super happy
but when you are gone, she cannot help but cry

when two worlds collide

i don’t do this sober…
normally i drink myself to comfortable
but with you it’s different…just being
and doing absolutely nothing
and everything
all at once
SO FUN! <3

even in silence
enjoying this….
every single drop

feel as long as it’s real

this overwhelming sense of being
overcomes from deep within
yet i have you to thank
you take me to places
i have never imagined could be real
but i feel this feeling
and it’s consuming
and unbelievably Zen
just memories
are all i need
and the thought of when it will be you and me
all over again <3

you have awakend something inside
and i have finally come to Life
after the aftermath
you have shown me a path
a secret sneak peak
at where this all might lead